0 6 / 1 2 / 0 2 :
'i a l o n e a g a i n s t
h u m a n i t y'

 

"i alone against humanity. i shall not use weapons made of wood or iron; my foot shall spurn the layers of minerals extracted from the earth: the harp with its potent and seraphic sonority shall at my touch become a formidable talisman."

-maldoror by the comte de lautréamont

can it reeeeally be my birthday again? already? my 'friends' reliably inform me that i am 32. bastards. still, they bought me presents so i shall be magnanimous and forgive. a whole bunch of us went ten pin bowling, great fun, though i bowled like the great joey deacon himself. in the end all present were roundly thrashed, trounced and buggered red raw (figuratively speaking) by fellow macrophonies organisation artiste ruse (sure signs of a misspent youth if you ask me) but he redeemed himself by giving me 'the complete captain scarlet t.v. series' set of videos. bless that man.

apparently the tallest giraffe ever recorded was 19 feet, 3 inches. well i never.

kidney stones update: went along to the hospital to have what the doctor referred to as an 'i.v.', which is basically an x-ray taken after they've pumped a certain chemical dye into your (meaning my) vein; apparently this stuff makes a bee-line for the kidneys and related plumbing. so after they'd taken a normal x-ray they injected me with the solution, after first explaining that i wasn't to worry, it wasn't radioactive, it worked by being dense enough to show up on the x-ray. "so, i won't glow in the dark then?" i asked, somewhat disappointed. the doctor grinned humourlessly and answered in the negative. the liquid they injected me with was described by the nurse as "a clear dye"; part of me thinks that this may be an oxymoron -another part of me thinks it might be a song by, is it barbara streisand? the hot feeling at the back of my throat i was told to expect was most odd and had an almost menthol tang to it. the human body is a strange thing. mine certainly is. of course what they don't tell me is that to stop the chemical excreting from the kidney too quickly (before they can get all the pictures they need) they first strapped me tightly to the table, with a wide canvas strap across my snake-like hips, and then inserted small sacks under the strap (but over each kidney, still following?) and then inflate them, exerting a frankly incredible pressure on the tubes leading from each of said organs. uncomfortable. it felt like two people standing on me, two fat people, holding anvils, one each side, on tip-toes. oooh. anyway they got the shots they needed (having a 'best side' is one thing but which is my most attractive kidney? i'll have to ask) and the upshot of it is that next year i'm booked in to have the remaining stone(s) zapped with sound waves, which probably sounds more exciting than it'll turn out to be. i'm playing with the idea of taking a mic in, recording the whole affair and perhaps posting samples on the macrophonies website…?

artistic fun in germany: "the woman, who has not been named, killed herself by jumping from the sixth floor of berlin's tacheles arts centre. police say her body was found hours later by a couple who took pictures of her, explaining to other bystanders that this was "a performance or an installation". finally, a 12-year-old pupil noticed that the body was an actual corpse."

both the liles/ruse 'a love song / radar' 10" (on pink vinyl) and the unsong 'the frailty of angels, the treason of people' cd are now available at the following record shops:
smallfish records: 372 old street, london ec1v 9lt.
rough trade: 16 neals yard, covent garden, london wc2h 9dp
rough trade: 130 talbot road, london w11 1ja
sister ray: 94 berwick street, soho, london w1f 0qf

smallfish records have filed the unsong album among their catalogue and describe it thus: "totally deep, really quite beautiful at times and very dark and disturbed at others. yes, this cd from brighton based macrophonies is a rollercoaster ride of intensity with wonderfully dense soundscapes and minimalistic pieces that grow with every listen."

micturition syncope: fainting after urination.

macrophonies organisatiopn should, at some point in the near future, be compiling a mail list of interested parties, to inform the general pubic of future releases, live events etc. if anyone is out there reading this, do drop us a line, any and all feedback at this point would be welcomed.

went for a very civilised and pleasant lunchtime game of pool at the elbow rooms with the venerable gude. he won, 2 frames to 1 (it being lunchtime, i hadn't drank neeearly enough beer for me to start even trying to hit the balls anywhere near accurately -excuses, excuses). to eat, i had what the barman described as a 'baby burger', when i asked him if there was any real baby in it, he just looked at me. turned out the 'baby burger' was just slightly smaller than their usual. shame. perhaps lubricated to a degree not usual for me at 2 in the afternoon, i then went and bought a kaoss pad: http://www.korg.co.jp/product/dance/kp1/ an item which though lovely and likely to improve unsong's live performance possibilities, i cannot really afford… o demon alcohol.

recommended: (audio) 'data rape' -cd- by expertimental audio research / (comestible) spicy peanut butter (with chilli seeds) from new york, mmmmm / (visual) nudity in the adult female / (sensorial) a warm room in a cold house

reviled: (audio) anything by u-fucking-2 / (comestible) salad cream / (visual) any christmas decorations / (sensorial) being strapped to that fucking x-ray table

why is it i always have more trouble with the recommended than the reviled? does this make me a bad person? oh, go on, say that it does…

and finally, there just has to be an album in this, no prizes for guessing what my favourite paragraph is:

"at the lab, two us researchers are working on ways to use sound to chill food…they have produced a sonic fridge that converts very loud sounds to directly cool a fridge containing ice cream. the researchers have exploited the fact that sound waves travel by compressing and expanding the gas that they are generated in…a temperature gradient can be generated by putting a stack of plates in the right place in a tube in which the sound wave is bouncing around. some plates in the stack will get hotter and others colder

now, matt poese and steve garratt of the applied research laboratory at penn state university are doing work on a small chiller cabinet that will be used to keep ice cream cool. the research is being sponsored by ice cream makers ben & jerry's and unilever. the pair are using enormously loud sounds to keep their chiller cabinet cool. humans feel pain when they hear sounds of 120 decibels, a level typically reached next to the speakers at a rock concert. the sounds pumped through the penn state fridge reach 173 db, tens of thousands of times more intense than any rock concert.

sounds of 165 db would cause a person's hair to catch fire from the frictional heating caused by air undergoing such intense compression and expansion.

thankfully, even if the fridge cracks open the vast sounds generated within will not escape because the intense noise can only be generated in the pressurised gas locked inside the cooling system. prototypes of fully functioning acoustic fridges have already been built and one has even flown on the space shuttle. the pair are hoping that their work will end reliance on the gases currently used in fridges that can contribute to global warming. the research could also make refrigerators more reliable because a thermoacoustic fridge has fewer moving parts. "

-from bbc.co.uk